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I’ve Never Felt Worse Than In the Moment I Looked My ‘Best’
It was one among hundreds taken by an expert photographer whose pleasantly scruffy assistant spent hours flitting descending bob hairstyles around her, holding a disc reflector to throw the Parisian summer light onto me just so. Before she’d even picked up her camera and he’d reluctantly put down his cigarette, a makeup artist had spent 90 minutes on my face, my hair, my nails. They were going for a ‘50s bombshell look – I’m not entirely sure why, now, but it made sense at the time – so there were hair extensions and curlers and false eyelashes and very bold red lips. In this photo, I’m sitting on a staircase, my hair mimicking the a curly black wrought iron bannister, with my hands demurely in my lap but my mouth slightly open in a Jessica Simpson-ish type of way. My wrap dress, which I almost never wore in real life because it was too revealing, too clingy, is showing just the correct amount of flesh. My eyes, due to the descending bob hairstyles falsies and whatever witchcraft the surly makeup artist did with my brows, look enormous.
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